Welcome

I've seen a lot of weddings. 

People hire me because they care about music and dancing, and that is the perspective from which I write-  throwing a killer dance party.

Remember that for every opinion or "rule" I espouse, there have been times when they've been tossed out and the party has been great.  But I've also seen events bogged down by avoidable obstacles.  I hope you find this useful. 

Everything You Need to Know About Hiring a DJ for a Wedding

Get a recommendation, or witness the DJ perform:  Witnessing a DJ rock the house or you talking to a trusted friend (with good taste) helps weed the crop of “professional” DJ’s.  A good DJ will have experience performing around town (or the world) and will have the expertise that goes with that.  I get 90% of my work from recommendations and people who’ve seen me perform.

Ability:  Quite simply, it’s the skill of playing the right song at the right time.  Forget about “scratching”, microphone skills, or wearing a stupid tuxedo, you want a DJ who can read a crowd; know when to bring the energy up, know when to play a slow jam, know what songs will bring the older folks onto the floor, what songs will make the younger crowd cheer, and when to drop the anthem that will bring everyone together.  Having good taste in music is part of it, but a DJ has to have an innate ability to choose the next song wisely. 

Experience:  There are a gazillion things that can go wrong DJ’ing a wedding.  Cords break, speakers fail, records skip, drunk dudes ask to bust a rhyme over the music, etc.  Any of these can drag your party to a halt.  An experienced DJ will have run into these problems before and will be prepared to solve them.  You don’t pay for experience when everything goes right, you pay for experience when things go wrong and you don’t want it to affect your party

Responsibility:  There are a lot of enormously talented people whose creative right-sided brains make this world a better place.  But you want your DJ to show up, on time, and be prepared.  Of course you want them to be creative and talented (see Ability above), but that does you no good if they flake on you. 

Taste in music:  “Good” music is subjective.  A wedding in the South might have more country western music, a Jewish wedding in New York will have its musical proclivities.  Personally, I like a well-rounded DJ that has genuine appreciation for different styles of music and can read a crowd.  That being said, not everyone is the right DJ for the job.  It’s important that you are musically simpatico with the DJ and that he/she can handle your requests.  If you don’t have strong opinions about music then see Get A Recommendation above.

 Meet the DJ:  Grab coffee and discuss your party.  You’ll get a better feel for the person, the kind of music they play, and see if it’s a good fit.  Plus they might have some insight that will help you prepare.

 Get a contract, place a deposit:  Sounds super business-like and impersonal, but you will feel better and it will go onto the DJ’s calendar as confirmed.   And you don’t want someone else swooping in to grab your talent.

 Book ahead:  Top performers are in demand and their calendars fill up fast.  I recommend six to eight months in advance, maybe more if your party is on a popular weekend.   At least get the conversation going and ask them to pencil you in, in case someone else contacts him/her.  If dancing is important to you, you should be thinking about this after you pick your date and choose the venue.

 Re-connect with the DJ the week of event:  A little reminder will kick them into high gear and give everyone peace of mind. 

 You get what you pay for:  Just like bands, caterers, or photographers, DJ’s posses a skill set that is available on the open market.  Maybe you can save money by catching them on the assent of their career or at a slow time of year.  Maybe you’ll find an amazing DJ that will quote you a super cheap price.  But performers that are talented, in demand, and good at what they do, cost a lot of money.  And keep in mind that the amount of time you see a DJ playing music is a fraction of the total time they spend preparing for and wrapping up a gig.  If you have zero budget you might be better off with an ipod, rental speakers, and a friend with good taste to make a playlist, because that’s the same thing you get with an inexpensive DJ.

Of course rules can be broken, and after all someone did hire me for my first, second, and third wedding.  But I also remember the time my power amp blew and I didn’t have a backup.  Or the time the bride and groom told me “all their friends were cool” and they didn’t want to hear “popular” songs, only to have me get terrorized by their guests demanding to hear Rapper’s Delight and Billy Jean.   At those parties I’m sure I was a good DJ and had lots of club experience, but in time I learned a ton about weddings.

This info might seem overwhelming, but the DJ should make it easy for you, not more difficult and you shouldn’t have to think about it on the day of your event.  If dancing and music is a priority for you, then your legwork will pay off. 

 Good luck and have a fun wedding day!

Social Cues: The First Dance

I’m a huge fan of having a first dance.  Weddings have built in cues and often guests will NOT start dancing until the bride and groom take their first dance together.  I will now contradict that statement by saying that some parties have epically awesome peeps raring to go OR have cultural traditions (Jewish) and will spark a dance floor before the first dance is taken.

Be aware that your first dance together has tremendous POWER to get a dance party going.  Taken too early might throw away the momentum, taken too late might delay the dancing portion of the night.  F.Y.I. - full bellies right after dinner will take some time to digest before you feel like shakin’ it.

My preference is to have a time window (after dinner, after cake, etc) and play it by ear, read the crowd, and use the first dance like a poker player going ALL IN at the right time (sorry for the poker reference).  If the dance floor sparks BEFORE the first dance then you can use it as lovely break in the action to have a shared romantic moment.

*A wedding planner gave great advice; designate in advance a handful of friends to take the floor to accelerate the momentum.  Usually I will get on the mic and invite everyone to surround the floor for the first dance(s) and then invite everyone to join in right after. Boom, dance party started!

Hot Hot Hot

Heads up, it’s difficult to get people dancing when it is super hot out. Outdoor summer weddings can have temperatures in the 100’s and when the sun goes down you can sense the relief from the party. Keep this in mind when planning the timeline and the dance floor location.

For example when the sun goes down and there is no AC inside a venue, people are going to be standing OUTSIDE cooling off for a while before entering to dance.

Experienced wedding planners and location managers are a great resource for advice on this matter. If it’s a private home/ location keep an eye on the weather pattern leading up to the event and build in some flexibility based around what you discover.

"I have to hear this song at my wedding"

If you HAVE TO HEAR a song at your party, let the DJ know, email an mp3 hard copy, and bring a backup on an ipod, cell phone, or other music player.  Having backups is always smart.

DJ's should want to get your list of song ideas because it gives them a good idea what you are all about.  I will bring songs that I own off the list, I will even buy a couple that are good ideas, if the list is long and the couple doesn't own them I will offer to BUY them on their behalf. I don't pirate download because the quality isn't guaranteed and it's not nice to artists. 

*A note about streaming services such as Spotify or Apple Music:  Sharing a playlist with the DJ doesn’t count as sending a “hard copy” of a song.  Because streaming is played off the magical cloud in the sky, it is unreliable and runs into technical difficulties.  I don’t use streaming services for DJ’ing, I use hard copies (mp3’s and old school vinyl).

Too Much Information

DJ's should be genuinely curious what clients want to hear for music and how the party map is laid out, the time line of the event, special requests, etc.  It's best to deliver that info in organized chunks.

One time the bride (bless her heart) sent me TONS of single emails with bits and pieces of info and adjustments on that info. When it came time for me to prepare week of, I had so many emails lined up it made my head spin.  All of her careful detail and planning became a maze of ADHD confusion.

My advice is to give your DJ the "big picture" details long in advance, maybe during your coffee consultation, and then send him/her the email with the mp3's and finalized details the week of.  And confirm they they received said email. This will help your DJ focus and stay organized, and eliminate time consuming communications and frustration when they missed a detail buried in an email.

Better to Burn Out than Fade Away

I like a big ending.  One last song to bring everyone together.  It's a great way to cap off a great day.  This involves having a stop time at an hour when the guests will still be present.

Be realistic about how late your guests will stay.  A destination wedding where everyone is sleeping on-site can usually handle a later stop time than an in-town wedding where it's easier for guests to peal away.  If your crew can handle a long haul party, and some can, consider a window for stopping and play it by ear.


It bums me out to have a handful of drunk stragglers for the last song instead of a big group of friends and family.  Consider going out BIG and taking it to an after party location.  And don't forget that you're gonna need time to clean up!