"I have to hear this song at my wedding"

If you HAVE TO HEAR a song at your party, let the DJ know, email an mp3 hard copy, and bring a backup on an ipod, cell phone, or other music player.  Having backups is always smart.

DJ's should want to get your list of song ideas because it gives them a good idea what you are all about.  I will bring songs that I own off the list, I will even buy a couple that are good ideas, if the list is long and the couple doesn't own them I will offer to BUY them on their behalf. I don't pirate download because the quality isn't guaranteed and it's not nice to artists. 

*A note about streaming services such as Spotify or Apple Music:  Sharing a playlist with the DJ doesn’t count as sending a “hard copy” of a song.  Because streaming is played off the magical cloud in the sky, it is unreliable and runs into technical difficulties.  I don’t use streaming services for DJ’ing, I use hard copies (mp3’s and old school vinyl).

Too Much Information

DJ's should be genuinely curious what clients want to hear for music and how the party map is laid out, the time line of the event, special requests, etc.  It's best to deliver that info in organized chunks.

One time the bride (bless her heart) sent me TONS of single emails with bits and pieces of info and adjustments on that info. When it came time for me to prepare week of, I had so many emails lined up it made my head spin.  All of her careful detail and planning became a maze of ADHD confusion.

My advice is to give your DJ the "big picture" details long in advance, maybe during your coffee consultation, and then send him/her the email with the mp3's and finalized details the week of.  And confirm they they received said email. This will help your DJ focus and stay organized, and eliminate time consuming communications and frustration when they missed a detail buried in an email.

Better to Burn Out than Fade Away

I like a big ending.  One last song to bring everyone together.  It's a great way to cap off a great day.  This involves having a stop time at an hour when the guests will still be present.

Be realistic about how late your guests will stay.  A destination wedding where everyone is sleeping on-site can usually handle a later stop time than an in-town wedding where it's easier for guests to peal away.  If your crew can handle a long haul party, and some can, consider a window for stopping and play it by ear.


It bums me out to have a handful of drunk stragglers for the last song instead of a big group of friends and family.  Consider going out BIG and taking it to an after party location.  And don't forget that you're gonna need time to clean up!

Wood

A wood dance floor sure is nice.  I've rocked cement, brick pavers, even grass, but there is something pleasant in how your feet slide across a wood floor.  Have you ever stood on cement for more than an hour?   It kinda hurts.  There is a reason they make those standing pads for factory workers.

I understand, renting a dance floor is expensive but it increases the odds that your party will go longer and stronger.  Last weekend I rocked a party that was on brick, the women took off their shoes.  It was all good.  But I love wood floors.

Is the Bar Close?

When couples ask me for advice on the party layout, I always ask, "is the bar close to the dance floor?"  They laugh thinking that I'm planning my drinking strategy, and I am, but  what I really want to know is are they dividing the party's energy?

People like to hang out close to the bar and if it's far away from the dance floor, you will have your party divided in half.  If you want the dance floor to blow up it's good to have the entire party close by, ready to jump in.

I recommend placing the bar far enough so that guests can drink and hold a pleasant conversation above the music volume, but close enough to grab your partner if you hear your jam being played.

All of our Friends are Cool

Early on in my wedding DJ experience (I had been spinning in clubs/ warehouses/ etc. for a while), I had a nice couple explain to me that they did not want to hear ANY standards, just rare and deep tracks.  No big wedding songs.  They explained that all of their friends where cool and didn't want to hear it.  I play mostly off vinyl records so I left my crop of wedding standards at home.  Big mistake.

While I agree that many of their friends where cool and probably had amazing taste in music, this didn't account for their parents, their grandparents, kids, family friends, etc.  I ended up eating shit all night as a long line of angry guests formed asking for XYZ song that I did not have with me.

I certainly don't recommend playing back to back classics all night (that can be fatiguing and lame), but I've seen some my COOLEST friends, fellow musicians and record collectors loose their minds to a big fat wedding jam that in any other environment would be embarrassing to like.

Weddings are part of our cultural fabric.  There is built in expectations depending on culture, religion, or whatever, to hear certain songs.  Again I wouldn't play ALL of those songs or push them one after the other into people's faces, but to deny a party the release of hearing a big song is a dangerous move, one that I don't participate in.